Day 1:
Me: Krishna, I stand before you today filled with anger, confusion, and pain. How could you do this to me? How could you tear my sister, my best friend, away from me? I thought you were supposed to be loving and compassionate. But now I question your intentions. Why did you choose to separate us? What kind of God would allow such suffering?
Krishna: My dear child, I understand your anger and frustration. I hear your cries and feel the intensity of your emotions. I am here to listen and offer guidance, even when you challenge my actions. It is natural for humans to question the divine when faced with immense loss and pain. Know that I am not the cause of your sister's departure, but rather, I am here to support you through this difficult journey.
Me: How can I trust in your so-called divine plan when it has caused me so much pain? You say there is a greater purpose, but I fail to see it. All I see is a cruel twist of fate that has left me shattered and broken.
Krishna: I understand that your pain has clouded your perception, making it difficult to find meaning or purpose in this moment. The human experience is complex, and sometimes it is through adversity that we grow and learn the most profound lessons. While I cannot explain the intricacies of your sister's departure, I urge you to lean on your faith and find solace in the belief that love transcends physical existence. Your sister's spirit lives on within you, and her impact on your life will endure.
Me: I don't want to hear about spiritual lessons or greater purposes! I just want my sister back. I want things to go back to how they were. Why did you have to take her away from me?
Krishna: I understand the depth of your longing, and I empathize with your pain. It is natural to desire what has been lost. While I cannot reverse the course of events, I can offer you solace, comfort, and guidance as you navigate this journey of grief. Your sister's presence will always be with you, albeit in a different form. Trust that she continues to exist in the realm of love and eternal connection.
Me: I know you are here to help, but I struggle to make sense of it all.
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| Drawing by Me |
Day 2:
Me: Krishna, I have been reflecting on your relationship with Draupadi, and it fills me with envy and anger. How could you have such a deep bond with her while I have lost my own best friend? It feels like a cruel twist of fate that you would favor her while I am left with nothing but sorrow and emptiness.
Krishna: My dear child, I understand the pain and frustration you feel. But please know that I do not play favorites. Draupadi's role in the Mahabharata was a part of a grand cosmic design. The circumstances of your loss and the bond I shared with Draupadi are separate entities, each with its own purpose and meaning.
Me: Purpose and meaning? What purpose could there possibly be in taking away my best friend, leaving me alone and heartbroken? If there is a greater plan, why couldn't it have spared me this agony?
Krishna: I understand that it is difficult to find solace in the midst of your pain. The journey of life often presents us with challenges and losses that seem unbearable. While I cannot undo what has happened, I am here to offer you solace and support in your grief. Your best friend's departure does not diminish the love and bond you shared. Hold on to the memories and cherish the moments you had together.
Me: Memories? Cherishing moments? How can memories replace the warmth of her presence? How can I find solace in fleeting recollections when all I want is to have her by my side, to laugh and share life's joys and sorrows together?
Krishna: I understand your yearning for her companionship, and I empathize with your pain. It is natural to mourn the loss of someone dear. But remember, the love and connection you shared with your best friend transcends the physical realm. She lives on in your heart, guiding you and watching over you from a different plane of existence. Though it may not ease your immediate pain, trust that her spirit continues to be with you, offering you strength and support.
Me: How can I trust in your presence when it feels like you have allowed such heartache to befall me? It seems like you have turned a blind eye to my suffering, favoring others while I am left to pick up the pieces of a shattered friendship.
Krishna: I have not turned a blind eye to your suffering, nor do I favor one over another. I am here, listening to your anguish, even as you express your anger towards me. In the depths of pain, it may be challenging to see beyond the immediate circumstances, but please know that I am by your side, offering solace and guidance as you navigate this difficult journey of loss.
Me: I find it hard to believe in your guidance when it feels like you have abandoned me. The pain is overwhelming, and I struggle to see a purpose in all of this.
Day 3-4 & 5 :
Me: Krishna, I've heard about your so-called friendships with Sudama and Draupadi, but it only fuels my anger and resentment towards you. How can you boast about these connections while I suffer from the loss of my best friend, whom you took away from me?
Krishna: I understand that you are consumed by anger and blame me for the pain you are experiencing. However, I did not take your best friend away from you. The course of life and destiny are complex, and sometimes we must face losses that are beyond our control.
Me: Don't try to justify your actions with vague notions of destiny. It feels like you deliberately chose to snatch my sister, my confidante, from my life. I trusted you, looked up to you, and now you have betrayed me.
Krishna: I am sorry for the pain you are going through, but I cannot take responsibility for the loss of your best friend. Life unfolds in mysterious ways, and it is not always within my power to intervene. I understand that it may be difficult to find solace in my words, but I urge you to channel your anger into healing and finding ways to honor the memories you shared.
Me: Honor her memories? How can I honor something that feels like a cruel joke? You talk about your divine plans and grand designs, but all I see is the devastation and heartbreak caused by your actions.
Krishna: I can sense your anger and despair, and I wish I could take away your pain. But blaming me will not bring your sister back or ease your suffering. Instead, I encourage you to seek solace within yourself, to find strength in the memories and love you shared, and to honor her by living a life that reflects the bond you had.
Me: How can I find solace within myself when I feel betrayed by the very entity I sought comfort in? Your divine plans mean nothing to me if they involve tearing apart the relationships I hold dear.
Krishna: I understand that my words may not provide the solace you seek, and I cannot erase the pain you are experiencing. But I implore you to consider that perhaps there is a greater purpose behind the events that have unfolded. While it may be difficult to comprehend now, there may be lessons and growth that await you on this journey of grief and loss.
Me: Lessons? Growth? I don't need lessons or growth; I need my sister back. I need the comfort and understanding that only she could provide. Your divine plans and lessons hold no value when I am left with this emptiness and despair.
Krishna: I can feel the depth of your pain, and I empathize with your longing for your sister's presence. Though I cannot change the circumstances, I am here to listen and support you as you navigate through this darkness. Lean on me, even in your anger, and together we can find moments of healing and understanding.
Me: I don't know if I can trust you anymore, Krishna. The anger and bitterness cloud my judgment, and it feels like you have abandoned me in my time of need.
Krishna: I have not abandoned you, even in your anger and doubt. I am here, patiently waiting for you to find your way back to the light. Trust may take time to rebuild, but I will be by your side.
Day 6 & 7 :
Me: Krishna, I want you to understand the depth of the bond I had with my best friend. We were inseparable, and our connection was unlike anything I had ever experienced. She was my rock, my confidante, and losing her feels like a betrayal of the highest order. How could you allow this to happen? How could you rip apart a bond that meant everything to me?
Krishna: I can sense your anger and the pain caused by the loss of your best friend. I understand that it feels like a betrayal, but please know that I did not intentionally tear you apart. Life is complex, and sometimes it brings us unbearable heartache. While I cannot change what has happened, I am here to offer support and guidance as you navigate through this difficult time. Take solace in knowing that the memories and the love you shared will forever be a part of you.
Me: But Krishna, memories are not enough. The pain of her absence is overwhelming. How can I go on without her by my side? The world seems bleak and meaningless without her laughter, her wisdom, and her unwavering presence. I feel lost and alone. don't give me empty words of support, Krishna. It's easy for you to talk about the complexities of life and destiny when you're the one pulling the strings. You claim to be all-knowing and all-powerful, but where were you when my best friend needed you the most? Why did you allow this tragedy to unfold?
Krishna: I understand that my words may not provide the answers you seek or alleviate your pain. It is natural to feel anger and question the fairness of what has happened. But please remember that I did not cause this tragedy. Life's events unfold in ways we cannot always comprehend, and it is not within my power to prevent every loss or heartbreak. I am here to listen, to empathize, and to offer whatever solace I can.
Me: But Krishna, it's not just her presence I miss. It's the future we had envisioned together—the dreams, the plans, the milestones we were supposed to celebrate side by side. All those moments are now shattered, and I feel robbed of the joy we were meant to experience together. How do I come to terms with this loss of a future that will never be? Your explanations and excuses won't bring her back, Krishna. I trusted you, I believed in you, and now all I am left with is shattered dreams and an overwhelming sense of abandonment. You call yourself the divine orchestrator of the universe, but all I see is a cruel puppeteer toying with our lives.
Krishna: I understand that it may be difficult to see beyond your pain and anger. I cannot change what has happened, and I can only imagine how devastating this loss is for you. But please know that I am here, willing to listen to your anger, your grief, and your confusion. It is through this dialogue that we can begin to find moments of understanding and healing.
Me: Understanding and healing? How can I find understanding in a world that seems determined to bring me nothing but pain? I don't want your empty gestures of healing; I want my best friend back. I want the happiness and joy we shared to be restored. Is that too much to ask?
Krishna: I understand that your pain is all-consuming, and the desire to have your best friend back is overwhelming. I cannot undo what has been done, but I can offer you my presence and support as you navigate through this anguish. The road to healing is long and arduous, but I will be here, walking beside you, helping you find moments of solace and peace amidst the storm.
Me: I don't know if I can trust you anymore, Krishna. The pain and anger have clouded my judgment, and it feels like you have forsaken me in my darkest hour. If you truly cared, you would have prevented this tragedy from happening.
Krishna: I understand that your trust has been shaken, and it will take time to rebuild that trust, if ever. But please know that I have not forsaken you.
Day 8-9 & 10 :
Krishna: I understand your need for concrete examples to make sense of your pain. Let me share with you a story from the Mahabharata, where Arjuna, one of the Pandava brothers, had to face a similar situation. Arjuna was deeply attached to his son Abhimanyu, but tragically, Abhimanyu was killed in battle at a young age. Arjuna's grief was immense, and he questioned the fairness of his son's untimely death. Despite his anguish, Arjuna found the strength to continue fighting, honoring his son's memory, and fulfilling his duties as a warrior. It was through this experience that Arjuna learned the importance of resilience and the inevitability of loss in the mortal realm.
Me: I can relate to Arjuna's pain and questioning. But how did he find the strength to move forward and fulfill his responsibilities? How can I find that same resilience within myself?
Krishna: Arjuna found solace and strength in the teachings and guidance I provided him on the battlefield of Kurukshetra. In the same way, you can seek solace in the wisdom and support of loved ones, friends, and even in your connection with me. Draw upon the memories and lessons shared with your best friend. Let the love you have for her guide you towards finding the resilience within yourself. Understand that it is okay to grieve and question, but also embrace the potential for growth and healing that lies ahead.
Me: Krishna, while I appreciate the example of Arjuna, I still struggle to see the purpose behind my own loss. Can you provide another real-life example that might resonate with me?
Krishna: Of course. Let me share with you the story of Rama, the beloved prince in the epic Ramayana. Rama, like you, experienced the pain of separation when his wife, Sita, was unjustly taken away from him by the demon king Ravana. Despite the immense grief and anger he felt, Rama remained steadfast in his righteousness and embarked on a journey to rescue Sita. Through his ordeal, Rama demonstrated unwavering devotion and the power of love. It was through this experience that he became an embodiment of strength and righteousness, inspiring millions with his story.
Me: The story of Rama resonates with me on some level, but it also makes me question why love and bonds have to be tested in such painful ways. Why is it that we have to go through these trials and tribulations to prove our worthiness of love?
Krishna: Life's challenges often serve as catalysts for growth and self-discovery. While it may be difficult to see the purpose in your current pain, know that these trials have the potential to shape you into a stronger and more compassionate person. Through the crucible of loss, you have the opportunity to deepen your understanding of love, resilience, and the value of cherished relationships. It is through these trials that we learn the true meaning of love and develop the strength to overcome even the most difficult circumstances.
Me: Krishna, I appreciate the stories you've shared, but I still grapple with the unfairness of my own loss.
Krishna: Certainly. Let me share with you the story of the lotus flower. The lotus grows in muddy waters, amidst unfavorable conditions. Yet, despite its surroundings, it blooms with breathtaking beauty and purity. The lotus teaches us that even in the face of adversity and unfavorable circumstances, something remarkable can emerge. In your journey of loss and pain, you have the opportunity to find your own inner lotus—the strength and resilience to rise above your circumstances and find beauty amidst the turmoil.
Me: The metaphor of the lotus resonates with me, as it represents the potential for growth and beauty even in the midst of challenging circumstances. I will strive to find that inner lotus within myself, to rise above the pain and cultivate strength and resilience.
Krishna: That is a powerful realization, dear one. Embrace the symbolism of the lotus and allow it to guide you in your healing journey. Remember that even in the darkest moments, there is the potential for transformation and growth. Trust in your own inner strength, and with time, you will find healing and renewed purpose.
Day 11:
Me: Krishna, I'm tired of these vague explanations! I demand to know why you took my best friend away from me! What purpose could there possibly be in causing me such immense pain and suffering? I trusted in our bond, and now I feel betrayed!
Krishna: I understand your anger and frustration, but you must understand that there are reasons beyond your immediate comprehension. Life is complex, and the workings of the universe are not always apparent to us. Your pain is not a punishment or a result of betrayal. It is an opportunity for growth and self-discovery, even though it may not feel that way right now.
Me: I refuse to accept this vague notion of growth and self-discovery! How can you expect me to find any meaning in this senseless loss? Our bond was supposed to be unbreakable, and you tore it apart! I trusted you, and now I'm left with nothing but heartache and emptiness!
Krishna: I understand your anger, and I empathize with your pain. But you must know that sometimes, the greatest lessons come through the most difficult experiences. Your loss has shaken you to the core, but it also has the potential to awaken strengths within you that you never knew existed. In time, you will discover new depths of resilience and purpose that will emerge from this darkness.
Me: I don't want your empty promises of hidden meanings and personal growth! I want my best friend back! I want the happiness and joy we shared! Why did you have to take her away from me? What purpose could it possibly serve?
Krishna: I can feel your pain, and I understand your anger. But it is important to remember that I did not take her away from you. Life unfolds in its own mysterious ways, and sometimes we are faced with losses that are beyond our control. Instead of directing your anger towards me, channel it towards healing and finding strength within yourself. There is a greater plan at play, even if you cannot see it now.
Day 12 :
Me: Krishna, I'm still grappling with the guilt and regret of losing my best friend. I can't help but blame myself. Was there something I did or didn't do that led to this separation? Tell me, why should I forgive myself for the pain I feel?
Krishna: Your self-blame is clouding your judgment. You must release yourself from the burden of guilt. You were a true friend, and you cannot control the choices others make. Blaming yourself only prolongs your suffering and prevents you from finding peace. You must learn to forgive yourself for not having control over the outcome.
Me: How can I forgive myself when I feel like I failed her? I keep replaying moments in my mind, wondering if I could have done something differently. The guilt is suffocating, and I don't know how to let go.
Krishna: Let go of the notion that you are solely responsible for the path of others. Each person has their own journey, and sometimes that journey takes them away from us. You cannot shoulder the blame for someone else's choices. Instead, focus on the love and connection you shared. Honor her memory by embracing life with love, kindness, and compassion.
Me: It's not that simple! I can't just switch off my guilt and move on. I want answers, I want her back! Your words of forgiveness feel empty and hollow. How can I find any solace in this pain?
Krishna: I understand that forgiveness is a difficult process, and healing takes time. But holding onto guilt and regret will not bring her back or ease your pain. Embrace the love and memories you shared, and let them guide you towards healing. Allow yourself the space to grieve, but also recognize that forgiveness is a powerful tool for freeing yourself from the chains of self-blame. Trust in the process, and I will be here to support you as you navigate through this journey of forgiveness and healing.
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